SHE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY

TODAY DMAE AM HEAR IS LIKE 1:44 and all I can do is think about someone that I realy realy realy love and want to be with but is so hard to be with her for alot of reasons so is like I dont know wat to do am about to give up on my love life and just foget about everyone and just have fun with my life. ITS HARD REAL HARD.


WELL let me talk about today. Today I woke up and was like omg wat a night I finaly got to sleep until like 10:00 so I went down stairs did not feel like eating anything so I just chilled then went to my room listen to music. Then my mom went to puck up my lil angel so came back and then me and the baby went to the drive in zoo that shit is far so me and her went and when we got there it was close so we went on some rids that they had for free and saw some animals like turtuls and some birds then went home I called my cuz to come and pick me up that I did not feel like been home so I came to his house and am hear chilling with him about to jump in the pool at 2:00 in the morning. SO THATS THE ONLY THING THAT REALY HAPPEN.

HAHA its been 2days that I dont write dame. Thats because I been working so fucking much that I have not had time 4nothing but work. I only been to school 1 time this week thats how much working I dont well am hear that am chilling in my room like always waiting on that one girl to call me or text me. I think she is mad at me today everything was going good but I dont know wat happen........ UMMMMM I DONT HAVE MUCH TO SAY ONLY THE SAME SHIT OVER AND OVER. UM life is gay the one that I want cant be with me like I feel like staying away from everyone and let everone forget about me and shit I mean everyone forgets about me even if I go away or not............

Anyways today am hear chilling my day went by faster then all the other day this week. It started like at 1030 today I went to work then got home and chillied then some good friends from high school came to my house and we just chilled me an my home girls chilled until like 11:30 and then they left so am hear dont have anything to do but listen to music and just chill so am OUT TAKE CARE AND HAVE A GOOD NIGHT EVERY ONE .

Last night I was so scared I went to sleep I felt woried I was lost in a way I was thinking I did something wrong the girl of my dreams out of know where she got off the phone with me and I was lost am like wat happen did I say something wrong she text me and told me no my love everything is ok just you shocked me with wat you said and I wanted to cry I said am sorry, I hope I said the right thing because today like she text me in the morning to say good luck on my test that I had today and goodmorning we talked a lil and then after my test I text her again she had to stop texing me bceause she did not have any signal when she got home she text me and said that she was going to fall a sleep but I realy hope I did not say anything wrong becuase it been like 7hours and she have not called or text me I think she forgot about me but how I always say I guess is ok she haves a b.f so wat can I do. ANYWAYS.......................

Today dame my back hurts from been siting down for so long. I woke up at 7:20 I did not feel like wakin up today. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I woke up at 7:20 how I said i got up went to the bath room bruched my teeth and head then went  down stairs ate break fast and after drikning milk I like to drink water or joice so I got water today I was so dame cold that I walked out side of my house and I was still cold. So wat ever I went to miami lakes tech to take mt other half of the test so I was there until like12:00 I wanted to get out of ther so bad. So then I went to dunkin donuts and eat 3 donuts and drank a capuchino thats the only coffie I like so then I went back to the school I went walking becuase how I said I sold my car so I had to wait on my mom but my mom was at the mechanic that there was something wrong with the car so then I stayed there at the school until like 3:00 then after that my dad needed myhelp at a big job that he was doing so I went and helped him we got home like at 8:30 and I went to take a bath now am hear writng and waiting on that butiful girl that I love so muchto call me or text me. an see if she realy fogot about me or thats just me thinking about it. Well thats about it with my life is 11::05 and am going to hit the bed real hard so goodnight. LOL TALKING ABOUT MY LOVE THERE SHE JUST TEXT ME DAME SHE GOOD WITH TIME.

WELL GOOD NIGHT.

Dame when you love some one but that person loves another person that makes life so hard like it makes you want to try your best but then some other time like you see that the person that she with goes in front for everything. Life is so unfair. Its even more unfair when you want to give that person more then wat she is geting from her b.f I would love you have her for one hole day so she can see how happy all make her. We will smile and be happy spend a good time together go out and spend a nice time with out doing anything bad. DAME IF SHE CAN JUST GIVE ME ONE DAY. IT hurts even more when you want to see her and she never haves time to see you w.e I cant say anything I guess she does have a man and that goes first.

Today where do I start off. Let me see today I woke up at 7.00 in the morning and my mom woke up she is like wat happen and I told her I had my test in the morning then I went downstairs and eat breckfast then my mom went an took me to Miami lakes to take my test I hope I passed it so then I went back home got on the computer and saw that there was no one on the computer so I just started reading some mail and shit that I had after that I went with my mom to pick my brother up from school took him to some other classes then she left me at american for my after noon classes. Now like 2hours ago I ate and got home and am hear writing dont have much to write.

Dame man life is so hard and so crazy. today I had a w,e day I mean my days are never something on the other side of this world. Today I woke up late like at 11 baby Emily woke me up by giving me kisses and hugs. I look at her an there she was we stay on the bed playing around and having a good time until the little one says she wants to see Dora so I got up and put Dora on. We stayed in bed a lil more until we saw it was like 12 we went down stairs and got something to eat she sat with me and we ate cereal. After that I went out side and she stayed inside looking at Dora. I went out and cleaned my moms car how I sold my car last weeK am using her car so I said let me do that for her. So I did then I came inside and went on the computer played Sim city for a long time then Emily came up and fell to sleep on my bed so I gave her a big kiss and let her sleep then when I look at the time it was already 9 so I got up and took her home then, there it started I gave my ex Wife a check and because  I did that she got mad and started fighting with me am like w.e. I drove of and my tird made noice so when I get home her crazy ass calls my mom that this and that an now I cant use her car shit is like so gay I dont know wat to do anymore I try to move on and is like it fuck. So  now am hear with my head feeling like is going to blow up of so much pain. Thats wat happen today am out.

Dame how life is u live and try to make things right or you think its right when other ppl think you are wrong; There is this nice girl that I like that I think she is so perfect for my life still but she says she thinks about me and she says all this nice things that I like to her but then when time  comes and show me wats really up she don't do anything. She haves a boyfriend but shows me a lot of nice things like how cool she can be how nice she is and a lot of other things this girl I have a lot of feelings for her like I can tell anyone how I feel about her and I can even tell her anything that is on my mind with out been scared of telling her. Me and this nice girl have a lot of history from when I was 12 and she was 10 there haves been so many times that me an her have been apart and back together that I see it like am meant for her but now that I have told her wats up she dont look at me in anyway but as a friend. Today Oct 11 she went one hole day with out  texting or calling  me am thinking shes having a great time and forgot about me so that shows me a lot about her but I guess she is the right person for me and I just have to wait or there is someone out there for me.

Today Oct 11, I woke up like at 11 my sexy baby was next to me trying to wake me up, her name is Emily. I woke up because she woke me up and me an her went to the bath room and brushed are teeth and went down to get something to eat then I called my cuz to see wat he was up to and he said nothing I went to the bank to put some money in the safe place then came back home call my cuz again and asked him if he wanted to go out fishing we went out and there was a big fat fish that me and him saw it was as long as my leg we could not get it. But my cuz got a smaller fish and we let it go, it was my second time fishing so really I did not get anything. There was this other guy that got a fish and was taking it home to eat thats nasty we where in the lake where a lot of ppl do shit in there that is nasty and that guy was thinking of eating that fish w.e. Then it started raining so we went home I asked my mom for her car keys and got some games for the computer then came home or lets say we went to my cuz house and try to play then I went home and stayed with the baby she felt to sleep and so I went back to fishing there was nothing so I went home then my cuz text me to go over that my other cuz Jonatan was out the house an they where play halo and played good after I got board I went home and hear I am the baby is stil sleeping and is like 12:30 and am still up. so that was my hole day today.